Auburn Hair
by mariajonsson
Summary: Modern AU – Catelyn is going through chemotherapy and starts losing her hair.


**Prompt: **Modern AU: She has always known that Ned loved her hair, but after she is diagnosed with breast cancer and loses her hair to chemo she sees how much he considers that trivial compared to his love for her.

**Warning: **NSFW – If you are sensitive to things related to diseases, particularly cancer, this story might not be for you. Although nothing descriptive about the disease in question is discussed other than the one side effect of chemo, hair loss.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing all characters belong to George R. R. Martin. This is just for fun or is should be.

**A/N 1: **I have no idea really why I wrote this, but I was reading through some prompts on the lj Kink Meme and apparently thought this was a great way to spend my night. It's really late and I really shouldn't be posting anything at this time of night, but if I don't do it now I'll never open this file again. Sorry for any mistakes and feeling that may come up during the reading of this.

Auburn Hair

She knew it would come, they had told her and she foolishly had thought she was prepared. But nothing could have prepared for when she woke up one morning and started brushing her beautiful auburn hair, and chunks of that same hair were so easily pulled loose from her head, not just a hair here and there but a whole chunk of it, somewhere from behind her left ear.

She had sat in front of her mirror for an hour crying her eyes out, holding those strands of hair, eternally grateful for being alone in the house as she mourned her health and fertility. She hadn't even told Ned – when she finally pulled herself together and finished brushing her hair, thankfully no more big chunks had fallen that day or she might have never gotten out of bed, she combed over the bald spot and did her best to act normal.

But as the days passed by, more of her hair came out and soon she had even begun finding them on her pillow when she woke in the morning and when she looked in the mirror she knew there was no hiding it anymore.

"I need you to shave my hair," she said, standing casually in the doorway of their shared bathroom, her hands trembling.

"What?" Ned said, looking at her, his toothbrush still hanging from his mouth, toothpaste all over his lips.

"It's time. I have that stupid wig and the scarves," she said, waving towards the closet where she had buried all that stuff beneath her mountain of shoes. "I know you love my hair, but…"

For some reason she couldn't finish, couldn't think, all those moments of lying on that stupid sofa in Ned's apartment during their first years, his rough fingers running through her hair, his only request at their wedding for her to wear her hair loose, the look on his face when he noticed that their first child also bore her hair. She hadn't even realize she was crying hysterically until Ned grabbed her and carried her to their bed, laying her softly onto their bedspread as if she were one of Sansa's porcelain dolls.

"Oh my love," Ned whispered against what little hair remained, "I love you, and that will not change because your hair has."

"But…" she choked out, her heart beating fast against her ribs as her stupid weak hands, grabbed onto him, as if he were going to leave.

"No buts Cat," Ned said firmly, "I care not at all what your hair looks like, so long as you do not leave me."

She couldn't see his face when she was so close to him, held softly in his embrace, but she could feel the tears that fell onto her head, her soon to be bald head. She had never seen him cry. Not once in their sixteen years of marriage.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, suddenly all out of tears. Her arms reaching for her husband, entwining themselves around his neck as he buried his face in the crook of her neck as he cried, sobs leaving his larger body, shaking the both of them.

It felt like hours before they parted, his gray eyes brimmed with redness, his face barren for all to see.

"Promise you'll fight this, that you won't leave me," Ned whispered, his pleas sounding so much like her own when her mother had fallen victim to the same plague. And she knew she had no promises to give, no more than her mother had for her.

"I love you," she said instead, reaching up to kiss his lips.

"Gods, I can't go on without you Cat," Ned said, determination written across his countenance, "I won't."

"Only the Gods can decide the destiny of men," she said soothingly, stroking a hand over his beard. "Now are you going to help me or should I go get Arya, I'm sure she's dying to get her hands on my hair, to get her revenge after years of me untangling that nest she calls her hair."

Ned did not laugh, but a small smile lit up his face, though it was gone as suddenly as it had appeared.

"Please Ned, I don't think I can bare going to a saloon and having some stranger do it," she pleaded, gabbing the razor, she had bought, from her nightstand, laying it in his open palm.

Ned said nothing, just nodded his head before standing up, reaching down for her and carrying her to the bathroom.

After it was done, she couldn't even recognize herself in the mirror, all of her auburn hair, or what had been left, was lying on the floor around her. She stroked a hand over her bald head and wondered if she'd ever grow real hair again, or if she'd look like this for the rest of her life. She looked up in the mirror and her eyes met his, her breath catching in her throat.

"You are the bravest, most beautiful woman I have ever known," he said, his eyes as full of awe and love as the day she walked down the isle, red hair loose about her shoulders, "I don't think I've ever loved you more than this moment."

Catelyn just looked into his gray eyes and smiled, she might never have her hair again, but she would always have Ned.

The End.

**A/N 2: **Again, sorry *here's a tissue if needed*.


End file.
